Somebody commenting here mentioned the idea of common preference parenting. I thought that this article was quite interesting on the topic of non-coercive parenting.
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:Fp1XmNKvMo0J:www.odemagazine.com/doc/2/you_re_not_my_boss/+%22common+preference%22+parenting&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk